The American Renaissance

Baja Canada del Sur: Comedy and Comment in the Age of Occupation

My Photo
Location: Little Rock, Arkansas

found done in needlepoint on Mel's Front Porch: I Pledge Alligence to the Constitution of the United States of America. And to the Republic for which it guarantees, One Nation, Undeniable, with Liberty, Truth, and Justice for All.

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Boy, I gotta get back in the swing of things

I've been so busy I even missed taking note of Fat Tuesday -- note to self: Contact St. Edward's and find out if one can give up Republicanism for Lent. Looks like I'm soon to make a trip with my brother to finally retrieve my own personal Holy Grail, in the form of a red motorbike down Austin way. Once that's behind me, life should settle down somewhat, and I hope to be blogging more often. It'd just be nice to catch up with my reading for a change! I will have to work out a schedule, as my online hours are limited -- Mama's a patient woman, but I can't be tying up her phone with dial-up 24-7 like I'm accustomed to. But just so's ya knows, I ain't fergot you guys -- E, spads, dada, pursey, az -- and everybody else. You know who you are.

Here's hoping the weather is as dizzyingly beautiful where you are as it is here...and if it ain't, here's hoping it's on the way. Cheers, lovely people.

(And yes, I had to put up this blog to push Georgie Girl down the page a bit. It was making me dread checking my own blog.)

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Oh, boy. Here he goes again.

Happy Valentine's Day from Our Only President! Yes, indeedy, there goes Shrub again, and he's once again at his normal abnormally petulent and belligerant level. Man, does he hate talking to the press. Even this lap-dog press that kisses his ass!
I'm going to watch the rest of the press conference and I'll be back later to update this post; feel free to comment in the meantime.

Classic Shrubbery

Sweet Child of God, where do I start? I'll warn you, folks, I've been dealing with trying to get information from recalcitrant medical professionals today, which was enough to set my teeth on edge anyway. And that's on top of enduring Bush's first press conference of the year? I'm not sure I can remain a gentleman about this, but here goes.

The gist of W's very poorly prepared (even for him) opening statement was this: I've listened to everybody, and I'm going to do it my way anyhow.

Well, gee whiz, what a surprise.
Then we moved on to the adversarial portion of the exibition, the spanking of the press. Molly Ivins was right. Not only is this guy a bad president, he's just fucking rude. Not a trait of any true Texan. Or any real Southerner of any flavor.
But once again, I digress. I won't bore you with too many of the particulars; just a few of the Special Moments we all cherish.

First there was the usual malapropisms. Calling Iran "Iraq" at least twice in one breath, without even apparently realizing it, was the least of sins. I'm also interested in how Bush plans to convince "the Iranians to get rid of its nucular weapons". I wasn't aware Iran had the bomb yet, but then again I've never had the precognition Our Only President possesses. Maybe possessed is the word I'm looking for here.

Then there was the reporter who had the gall to ask a pointed Libby trial question. Bush swatted him down with "I'm not talking about that" three times (similar in a way to a situation involving another Peter, before the famous rooster crowed). Good for him that Bush offered to 'recycle' him. Because our prez believes he is a "kind man". Ask someone who used to live in the Lower 9th how kind he is.

Meanwhile, let us thank the gods Bush refuses to be the Pundit in Chief...although he is still a talking head for No Child's Behind Left. He says he hears the complaints, some say there's "too much testing", others "don't want to be held to account". I say let Bush himself pass a high-school TASL, or WASL, or whatever they call the 10th grade test in your state. I mean, if your kid has to have that to get just an HS diploma, don't you think your President should have that proficiency as well? And if he flunks it, I think he owes every kid in America free college tuition. I call that "compassionate investment".

Last but not least, I think I was most charmed by Shrub baldly stating, in reference to trying to impose international sanctions, "money trumps peace sometimes".

Again, I quote Mama's phrase. Well, gee whiz, what a surprise.
Better yet, my brother's "well ain't DAT a bitch".

My advice late on this VD? Make sure you tell your honey you love 'em and give 'em a squeeze. If you're single, call your mom or favorite aunt tomorrow just for shits and grins. Hold forth with laughter and joy; and everything we cry over we fight tomorrow.

Me? I'm scheming on my own local Pots~n~Pans Brigade. Molly said raise more hell.

Thursday, February 08, 2007

A Charter Member of the Lawson Road Gang Sounds Off

I've made some interesting observations since moving home to Arkansas, formerly known as the Land of Opportunity. I think these days the slogan here is the Natural State. I wonder what would be the UnNatural State? Utah, maybe?

(Sorry 'bout the jab, Deke)

But I digress. I have been known to do that on occasion.

As I was saying, being back down South is anything but boring. Leave it to my home town to build a Big Dam Bridge as part of its expanded hike-n-bike trails. Rumor has it CAT (that's Central Arkansas Transit) is seriously contemplating adding bicycle racks to their buses, something I dearly miss from living on Puget Sound.

I noticed today as my mother and I were running endless errands*, there seemed to be more three-year-old Kerry bumper stickers on the freeway than those for W. Almost as if those who supported Kerry were damn proud of it, and Shrub's folks are finally getting sick of the horse hockey being shoveled at them. Arkansas may be a small southern farming state, but the politics are more progressive than one would assume. Folks here are somewhat aggressively plain spoken, and will tell you what they think, while unfailingly managing to be polite about it at the same time. I think this is where I got my ingrained sense of fair play.

Speaking of which, our new Democratic Governor Mike Beebe (that's pronounced like the Red Ryder gun) is in the process of keeping one of his most important campaign promises: rolling back Arkansas's idiotically regressive grocery tax. The Repugs in the State Ledge offered a lame-ass income tax credit instead, and Gubner BB quite correctly nixed any such noise on the grounds the grocery tax hits the poor and elderly the hardest, and a large proportion of those folks don't even pay income tax. I'm impressed and tickled.

Also coming down the pike in this new bluer day is the rollback of the consolidation of the state's Department of Health and Human Services, and the boost in funding to make it possible. After watching first-hand the Repug-lead killing and defunding of services in Texas, it's nice to see some of the same errors that were made here being rectified. And who oversaw the Greedy Old Party's moronic agenda in the Natural State the last few years? Why, none other than Mike Huckabee, Arkansas' latest ex-Gubner and recently-declared Presidential candidate. He's been enthusiastically endorsed by our old friend Tom "The Bugman" Delay. 'Nuff said on the Huck's credentials.

On the flip side of the coin, I was rather dismayed to see the local CBS affilliate devote almost ten minutes at the top of the late news broadcast last night to a local gentleman and his website on the Rapture. Four or five minutes after the weather, or sports, as a human interest story I might could have stomached. I'll be composing my letter to the head of the news department at KTHV soon after I finish writing here. And God, please save me from your followers.

So folks, at the end of the day it looks like my expectations about moving home are being met. There's some personal challenges, there's some things I'm really happy to see, there's a few that make me roll my eyes, but mostly it's just good to be back home.

As a postscript: To all you folks I read and blog with on a regular basis, please don't take it personal if I haven't been to your Places lately. I will be by soon as my schedule settles down, and you're damn sure not forgotten.

*Said endless errands being trying to get my AR driver's license reinstated. We finally got it accomplished, but it involved two separate days, one trip downtown, three to Southwest Little Rock, and another to West Little Rock to rearrange insurance to the state's finicky pleasure. I may have learned fair play here at home, but now I remember Arkansas is also where I learned to despise mindless bureacracy, too.

BREAKING NEWS: Anna Nicole Smith Dead in Florida

Just when we thought life was getting boring...

Even my mom says something sounds fishy here. The only thing now in question is who, out of all those with motive, kacked Anna. I can't imagine this is a death of natural causes.

My personal opinion? O.J. did it.

Friday, February 02, 2007