The American Renaissance

Baja Canada del Sur: Comedy and Comment in the Age of Occupation

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Location: Little Rock, Arkansas

found done in needlepoint on Mel's Front Porch: I Pledge Alligence to the Constitution of the United States of America. And to the Republic for which it guarantees, One Nation, Undeniable, with Liberty, Truth, and Justice for All.

Saturday, September 30, 2006

Ring Around the Rosie...and a Pocketful of Posers

There once was a Rep from the Sunshine State
Who was an Enemy of the criminals we all hate
Protecting the young
Unless they were hung
For his comeuppance we wait breath abate!

And you guys thought I forgot…

Cut-off for limerick entries Oct. 17, top ten published on the 24th, and I will ask for chime in's on everybody's choice, winner on the 31st...I just now realized Halloween is exactly a week before the election. Ain't that NEAT!

And back to our man of the hour Mark Foley. Like Jim West (god rest him), Jeff Gannon, and others yet to be exposed, the neo-con movement is proving itself to be rife not with homosexuals so much as blatant hypocritics. Beyond the obvious here is also the nasty underbelly of the current powers. They discredit anyone throughout society who says there is such a thing as sexual harrassment; can you think of a better case of it than a powerful Congressman boypussy-shopping among 15-year-old pages who hope not to offend anyone powerful in Washington in what may be their first chance to make an impression there? I fear truly for what the young women pages have been putting up with!

These are the people who promised to bring dignity back to the White House, and by proxy to Congress. The same folks who impeached a good President for an indiscretion with an adult. Of the opposite sex.

I don't know who busted this one out, but if it was one of the kids this sleaze was feeling up, email or otherwise, I hope he knows by being brave, he might just have saved his country.

And I hope the election doesn't let him down.

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

So! How Long before a Lame Duck Congress Outlaws the Constitution?

Let's be clear in our understanding. I love the United States Constitution and the Bill of Rights every bit as deeply as Southern Babtists love John 3:16. No matter how the old document gets batter'd by the Church of Latter Day Greed, "We the People of the United States" have not only the right, but the obligation to hold every public official representing us to their own solemn pledge to uphold that old document, the bedrock of our country.

The recent, much bally-hooed "rebellion" of a few Republicans in Congress has been just another simple exercise in distraction. Not only is there no ambiguity to the Geneva Conventions, there is absolutely NO QUESTION that coercion, torture, kidnapping, and denial of due process are ILLEGAL actions that have been undertaken by officials of the United States of America, under direct orders of the Bush Administration, against American citizens and other humans abroad.

And now they are talking about classifying people as "illegal noncombatants". Ain't that neat? What constitutes a LEGAL non-combatant in Kool-Aid Land? We live in a country where my college-educated fiftysomething cousin couldn't give me a better explaintion for outlawing gay marriage than "well, it's probably going to cost the rest of us something". And she volunteers at the Clinton Library in Little Rock.

A good woman, my cousin...she was more than able to hear me say it's not right to deny somebody access to their partner when they are hospitalized, especially if they are terminal. Any more than it would be right to keep a loved one of opposite sex away from a person -- and it does happen. My good cousin, who has grandkids of her own and not all the product of marriage, said she never thought of it that way...

Legislators, state and federal, have passed laws that are unconstitutional. And we have always had the judiciary branch, in its sole reason for existing, counter foolish sentiment that violates the ultimate law of the United States, that old document called the Constitution.

The "compromise" working it's way through Congress? Outlaws every protection guaranteed by the Constitution. They are outlawing a class of people, determined by the executive, of any and every recourse to end an already years long "extraordinary" imprisonment.

And once they do that? Once any American citizen has no rights, any other American can be denied. Illegal noncombatant could, and quickly will morph into illegal indigent. Or illegal agitator. Or illegal illiterate. Or illegal moral degenerate.

I am no product of some imaginary "liberal elite". I got two years of business college, and am a daughter of fairly low middle class folks from a small farming state. I ain't ever that durn smart, despite my gift for gab. But I do understand the concept of fair play, and I do understand MY hell with GOP lawyers who scream for 'tort reform'. And to hell with ANYONE in public office who's sworn not to protect the homeland, but who swore so help me God to uphold the Constitution, and breaks it every day.

It's not about the Geneva Conventions. It's not about protecting Americans. It's not about spreading democracy.

It is about the ultimate deregulation. It's about abolishing the basis of America's very culture and identity, the rule of fair play. It's about killing the Constitution.

I have faith in the Constitution. I have none in men, or women. One explains the other.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

In Fond Memory

Texas, and the country, has lost a legend. Ann Richards passed away tonight, peacefully at home, surrounded by her family. She was 73.

I was proud to live in Texas while this wonderful woman was governor, and I am simply without words. My deepest sympathies go out to her family and friends. I'll leave you with a quote (one of many -- the lady had an amazing way with words).

"I am delighted to be here with you this evening because after listening to George Bush all these years, I figured you needed to know what a real Texas accent sounds like."
~~ 1988 keynote address, Democratic National Convention

Be at rest, Ann. We will sure miss you.;_ylt=Ap7Gq7u932fk0TYLq9KM8Q5dPqwv

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

A Late Labor Day Moment

~~call this

How I've felt about every temporary job I've ever had...

And the maitre 'd said, "Bitter, party of one?"

Don't worry y'all, you know I'm playing. I love ya, America.

Sunday, September 10, 2006

When the only tool you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail

Did you guys see Bush last September down in the Gulf States? One of his photo ops was a Habitat For Humanity construction site, and I swear it took him forever to work a ten-penny nail into a piece of particle board sitting on two sawhorses. You would think a Texas rancher capable of clearing brush would know not to choke up on a hammer like that, but maybe I'm just being too hard on such a "man of the people".

I never figured out what help that was anyway to the other volunteers rebuilding the house, but supposedly it, um, looked good?

I guess it's no surprise Shrub's useless building something. But he's a handy little somebody destroying stuff. Like every business he's been in charge of. Arbusted? Nice to be an inept businessman always able to bail, or be bailed out by Daddy's friends. Heh, heh, heh.

How did this cipher ever get to be Our Only President?

We all know Cheney is Geppetto to the long-nosed Boy. But our Pinocchio is no innocent this time. And his puppetmaster is no good Daddy.

I'm still torn about ABC's airing of "The Path to 9/10", from all reports a fictional representation of one of the saddest events in our history. I probably will tune in...partially for the same reason I tune into Rush and his cohorts from time to time, just to keep up with what the little pricks are saying. And I was disgusted as a kid to be confronted by a stern-faced priest when I came out of seeing "Life of Brian". I've always hated people who protest movies who haven't even seen them on the theory that Some Subjects Are Sacred.

On the subject of an already-paid-for-no-need-for-commercials mini-series that reportedly plays fast and loose with established facts, I understand the idea of boycott. ABC claims to still be in the editing process; a large joke. Since when is a network editing a mini-series hours before broadcast? This pig has been in the can for months. What kind of magical lipstick can change the tone? I will watch to see just that.

Then again, I'm hearing my mother's dictum, You Don't Have to Stick Your Head in a Bucket of Crap to Know it Stinks.

Here's some homework for anybody else tempted to sit through ABC's offering; count how many times you hear the following:

72 virgins

Extra credit for pointing out admin buzzwords I'm not already anticipating.

And for the record? Disney characters always sucked. Bugs could whoop Mickey's butt without touching him.

Saturday, September 02, 2006

The NPMFPLC wants YOU write a limerick! I've been coming up with some, and it isn't as easy as it sounds. But then again, some of the best limericks have fairly tortured rhymes and whatnot, so don't be discouraged.

There is without a doubt plenty of fodder these days for comedy, political or otherwise. Especially on the cusp of Election Season. Bush claiming he's not making political speeches this week in itself is ripe -- exactly what business does Chucklenuts imagine he's in, anyway?

Then there's the Secretary of Delusion, Rumsfeld. What a putz. Having him accuse us of moral and intellectual confusion is somewhat like having Don Ho accuse me of being Hawaiian. Considering how Rummy likes the word fascist, I think he must have wrote that speech looking in the mirror.

Speaking of fascism, if you want to arm yourself with some actual factual information, Thom Hartmann (see comments for link) recently wrote an excellent essay on the subject -- the point of which is that the Islamist terrorists are not fascists; they are profoundly theocratic. Fascism can be defined as "a system of government that exercises a dictatorship of the extreme right, typically through the merging of state and business leadership, together with belligerent nationalism" (American Heritage Dictionary, circa 1983). So much for intellectual confusion.

I've composed yet another lame little limerick -- I think I must have had Labor Day and whistleblowers on the brain. So in honor of all the folks who brought us OSHA, the weekend, and overtime pay; and everyone still working for the little guy by speaking up to the Man, I humbly offer the following:

For Honesty, it's sure tough now being battlers
But I am proud to be one of the tattlers
And like Ms. Ivins sez
Rummy, Dick, and the Prez
Are meaner'n a skilletfull of rattlers